"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.... You must do the thing you think you cannot do".
This was said by Eleanor Roosevelt...and how true! Let's pick it apart. She says, you gain strength. But surely you need to be strong first if you're going to do something scary?!! Ok. Fair comment. You may think you need to do some self talk, take some deep breaths, stand tall and strong and then do it. Maybe? What about courage. You need to be brave to attempt something you're afraid of...surely? Well what about confidence? You must have confidence to do that thing that scares the living s**t out of you?! Well if that were true, you'd never do anything...ever. Because to wait until you've got all of these three things all operating nice and smoothly and THEN go and do that scary thing. You'll be waiting around a very long time. Why? Because we fluctuate all the time. Especially as women. We have hormones, that lead to mood changes, that lead to other peoples' reactions to us that affect our emotions and again our moods and the circles intertwine constantly. No. We need to just GET ON WITH IT! Let me tell you, the feeling after you do something that previously has made you want to throw up at the mere thought of it, is incredible. Strong, would be an understatement. Powerful, incredible, amazing, uplifted, on top of the world and fantastic is more like it. The immediate feeling of courage that you could do it again and again with an energy and confidence that feels brand new and yet has always been a part of you is like a sharp injection of amazement that hits you from inside...right between the eyes. It can make make you giggle. It can make you cry. Even talk to yourself a little. You might feel cold, and start to shiver. You might start to sweat and breathe heavily. You'll react thats for sure. If you don't, then you probably weren't that scared of it after all. But however you feel. OMG you'll have jumped forward to that next level in your life, and like it or not....there is no going back! BUT, there are new people here in this new place. New feelings, new emotions, new friends, lots of new friends. So, my friends, I ask you, to ask yourself....honestly. What is it that you're afraid of? What is that thing you think you cannot do?
Answer these questions: What scares me really?
What have I been putting off doing?
What am I afraid to wear?
What am I afraid to say to that person?
Who do I lie awake at night wishing I could be like?
Who am I afraid to speak to?
Where am I afraid to go? (and I don't mean walking down dark alleys here)
What have I been putting off starting?
What have I been putting off doing?
That's brilliant. Well Done! Don't worry about the reasons why you've not done these things (probably because you're afraid/scared/petrified etc). Just do yourself the good service of answering honestly.
Now give them a score from 1 - 10. (10 being the scariest). Some can have the same score ie you can have 6 number 8's, 4 number 3's, a couple of 7's and a 10 if you like.
Now take all of the lowest scored and if there's more than one, then score these again with 1 being the lowest and going up, 2, 3, 4 etc.
Now, taking the lowest scored of these ie number 1 and go right now and make 1 small action towards DOING IT. Whether thats writing it in your diary, making a preparation phonecall, whatever it is. Your aim is, to have it completed or booked, or bought or whatever it is, done by this time tomorrow. Hold yourself accountable. Go DO IT NOW.
Talk to you tomorrow